Wednesday, September 17, 2008

things that occur to you

Specifically, things that occur to you while standing for three hours in front of Safeway waiting for a taxi.

-There are a lot of pumpkin decorations walking by.
-There are worse things than getting paid for sitting around on your ass.
-All the birds are flying in one direction. Must be a migration thing.
-Why would you get baked off your ass before coming to Safeway? Shopping takes concentration, dammit.
-I wonder how sunburned I'm getting.
-This dispatcher clearly thinks I'm just messing with him.
-Why don't I bring a book to this damn thing?
-No, creepy guy holding the gas canister, I'm not taking a ride in your shady-ass car.
-Why are all the birds flying West? Is this like Heaven's Gate for birds?
-The longer I'm waiting here, the better the story this will eventually make.
-If I call this dispatcher one more time, he's going to leave me stranded here forever.
-That taxi saw me, said to itself "hell no," and then drove away. I'm a leper fare.
-I could have walked the first shopping cart to the facility, unloaded, walked it back, walked the other cart to the facility, unloaded, walked it back, then walked back to the facility by now. Excellent.

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